Thoughts // Lauren Madsen

I am so happy to have Lauren in this space today. She has graciously shared her personal testimony and findings through her study of The Book of Mormon. Our hope is that it simply encourages you to do your own action and FIND your answers. 

"You are so negative all the time--you're always complaining!" That is the gist of what he said. It's been 17 years so I don't remember his exact words, but I didn't need to. His message was loud (literally) and clear. It was lunchtime during my senior year of high school when a boy in our group had apparently had enough of me and let me have it. It hurts my heart now to imagine how many people knew me back then and might only remember me as that...the negative girl who complained.

To be fair, I don't think I ever intentionally approached life in a negative way. But I do believe I was by nature more of a pessimist than optimist. As I have been studying The Book of Mormon again and comparing Laman and Lemuel's reactions to Nephi's reactions I have to feel some gratitude for the honesty of that kid in high school. BECAUSE he said what he did, my eyes were opened and from there I wanted to make a change. In all the years since that day in the lunchroom I have worked hard on training my brain--to find and focus on the bright side and live in gratitude daily. And I haven't done it alone.

Last week when I read 1 Nephi 3:7 "I will go and do....for I know that the Lord giveth no commandments unto the children of men save he shall PREPARE A WAY for them..." I started to think of it in terms of personal goals and habits and self improvement. Sometimes the going and doing that's needed isn't a one time event, but an everyday attempt. And hopefully, as the days, weeks, months, and even years go by, we are slowly and surely becoming the person we set out to be. That is how it's been for me, relying on the Lord to lead, teach and remind me. Everyday.

I imagine for Him it's kind of like how I've felt teaching my daughter to roller skate. Some attempts are better than others. One day she seems to have it down and she's pleased as punch and another day she wants to quit because it's just too hard. But over and over again, I help her up when she falls and encourage her to try again. No matter how many times I am more pessimist than optimist, more like Laman and Lemuel than Nephi, the Savior will always help me up and encourage me to keep trying. I'm fairly certain most people who know me now wouldn't categorize me as negative or a complainer and that's all because of HIM. He can prepare a way for any of us to improve because HE IS THE WAY. He has (and is) helping me become more than I ever could on my own. And maybe someday, someone will say loud and clear, "Lauren is always so positive and tries to see the bright side!" Maybe not in exactly those words, but that will be the gist of it. :)

//

I am so thankful that Lauren sent these words to my inbox. I think we all have little cracks in us, inside struggles that maybe no one knows about. Perhaps mental struggles, emotional weight, or spiritual resistance. The vulnerability in recognizing those cracks and struggles, brings beautiful introspection and personal conviction to MOVE towards our Savior in those "flaws" or struggles. The act. To learn and grow and change with His grace and love on our side. 

As a side note: it brings me to tears to see you finding your own personal answers through your study of The Book of Mormon. To see your words and heart written on the pages of your Study guide makes my heart swell in gratitude. 

The Guides are currently sold out! I cannot believe it. You guys are incredible and your support grounds me and has blessed me in such a personal way. Pre-Orders will open up 1/29 with a new shipment coming in the first of February sometime to be announced when it gets closer. 

FIND YOUR ANSWERS.